I don't know what to do.
I did the best I could. He said he wants to work things out. He says he loves me.
So, I dressed up and we did Christmassy things.
I took him to our teenage hangout at the mall. There is nothing like roaming a giant labyrinth, smelling gingerbread and other homey smells, taking in the sights and sounds of the holiday season to make someone feel love.
I thought it worked....
but alas
It got me a simple 'good-night'.
My final thought of the night was that marriage is one constant act of seduction and if my stripper boots and low cut dresses don't do it for him, nothing will.
Maybe this is how it's supposed to be after twenty years.
Maybe this is a normal marriage.
Then, why do I feel so sad?
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