Have you ever seen a bucket of crabs? One crab may be able to leap over the side and try to scurry away but another crab always finds a way to pull the would-be escapee back in the bucket of doom.
Well....
I can't leave just yet.
Nope.
All the money is out of my reach.
It took me five days of pointed questions, five days of nagging, five days of asking the right questions to get to the truth. With a guy like that you have to ask the right questions or you'll never get to the truth.
A normal guy wouldn't do that.
He put the money we use to pay bills in his 401K. Thousands of dollars went missing. He said he put it in his retirement savings account.
I can't touch the money but he said he did it because he loves me.
The bills aren't getting paid. I feel ashamed of staying in this marriage now. I feel angry because I listened to my Christian friends who said a semi-separation, no sex, no love relationship was what God wanted for the kids because God hates divorce.
I'm sure God hates bearing false witness, too. Heck, that was one of the commandments. I don't remember seeing the word divorce there.
He took the money and stopped paying the bills because he loves me.
How in the heck is getting six robo-calls concerning his Citi-bank credit card each and every day considered love?
I would have preferred an awkward acknowledgement on any Valentine's day over the course of the past three years.
I'm upset that Citi-bank's robo-calls never fully disconnect, so I can't get a line out of the house after they call unless someone else calls in. I am thankful they called, though, because if it were not for them, I wouldn't know that the money was moved.
Well..
I'm going to have to get crafty now. I hate hiding assets. I've always been honest and that is my undoing. He hides assets. He makes decisions without telling me. To survive, I may have to do the same.
It is darn near impossible for honest people to divorce dysfunctional, liars.
I may have to file pro se in order to keep him from taking out a loan against the equity in our home. My mind is racing to find any other possible way he can screw me. I scrimped. I saved. The money I brought here paid the down payment. I'll be furious if he takes that all from me.
I'm trying to play fair but I think that is what is giving him the power to destroy me.
I'll black out the blog the day I figure out how to file but I want to document what is going on just in case something happens to me.
I still don't understand why I got threats from his former employer at the city.
That is the piece I can't fathom.
If he were behind it, would they have allowed their lawyers, officials, and cops to abuse me? To call me on the phone and tell me I'm at fault for his job loss? To threaten me on the phone? To lie about me in court? To depose me for eight hours asking questions about my business and political aspirations? To threaten to abusively audit any business I start? To have their vehicles sit outside my house?
I DO giggle when I think of the idiot attorney who claimed that Mike forced me to be a politician.
Yeah....I wanted to sing outloud 'beat me, whip me, make me run for Congress!
Alas, it couldn't be done. The problem is that when you are a wanna-be politician, you can't say those things in front of a tape recorder or the .wav will find its way all over the internet.
So, I just smirked. There were no cameras.
Then I started twirling my necklace. Trust me, this hypnotist owned those lawyers. When the lead lawyer broke the trance and realized what happened, she tried to shame me. I just grinned and she abruptly ended the deposition.
I got what I wanted, tons and tons of evidence spoken into a tape recorder, typed up in pretty lines and ready to be uploaded to a website detailing the antics of abusive employers.
I was in rare form that day.
Still, I don't know what exactly is going on.
I've been trying to escape this marriage since December of '00, when he left the first time. He left me because his family disowned him. I didn't know my place, they said. I was supposed to give up school to tend to their every need.
I didn't. I just went from an in class schedule to an online course schedule and met with my professors while my ex was at work. It took three times as long as usual. I had to take out loans but I met my requirements and graduated without pissing him off. He never celebrated my graduation.
At the same time, I helped him get his degree. I helped him write papers, did the childcare, and stay organized. We celebrated his graduation.
When I wouldn't quit school, they disowned him and started a campaign of harassment against me.
Families can be weird. I get that.
Employers? City Governments?
That's were I get lost.
No...here's the part I really don't get.
Why would his boss, a Tax Audit Supervisor for the city in which I live, repeat the exact same gossip my mother-in-law tells everyone in a court of law?
Either he bad-mouthed me and she participated in the abuse by repeating it.....or his mother knows his former boss.
I'll get to the bottom of it.
I wonder if I can sue them for emotional distress. I still hear the gossip in public by former city employees...
to this very day...
Next time, it would behoove Ms. Donnielle and her lawyers to refrain from repeating gossip. Sometimes it makes political activists go away....other times it makes them angry enough to be a thorn in your boss's side.
Love,
S.
No comments:
Post a Comment