This has certainly been a strange year. I do one silly love spell to save a dead marriage and the men from my past are showing up out of nowhere. Funny thing, they are all Scorpios. So, now, as their birthdays crop up, I can't help but think of them.
To tell the truth, Scorpio men are not the best choice for a woman trying to prove to herself that she has he same self-control as a saint. No...sir....the way they tilt their heads and stare into your soul is really hard to ignore.
Then, there is always the one that Eros nails a woman with first: he's ten times worse than any other because he is he origin of any desires. It doesn't matter how old he gets, he still has that adorable affect which has the same effect on her.
Then, the day finally comes when she realizes, with horror, that any man that followed had far too much in common with that one first love. Who does she really love then?
It's usually shortly after this point that the universe brings the woman together with that first love. It should be a fun filled time of reminiscing but, due to her recent inner revelation, she's uneasy, easily freaked out, and in denial.
When this happened to me, my denial created a silent wish to move to Costa Rica and change my name to Blanca Nieves (or something else denoting my impossible wish for purity). In the past, when confronted with confounding feelings, running away was always my answer.
Now, I just get dizzy. I developed vertigo as I was preparing to say goodbye to my first love after seeing him for the first time in ages. I guess Vertigo is a perfect psychosomatic reaction to acting on my ego's desire to stand up erect while my heart and mind were falling all over the place.
My advice, don't let that happen to you. If you're ever in that situation, just fall. Don't fight it. If he's not interested, you can just pick yourself back up without regret.
The truth of the matter is that the men from my past are ghosts. I can fantasize all I want about what could have been. In reality, I know, I'd probably be better off letting a demon incubus steal my soul. There is a reason things did not work, even if I do not remember the reason.
Que Sera Sera....
Ah, but no incubus can steal what I gave away to HIM so freely.
Sigh....
For what it is worth, Happy Halloween!
I'm pretending to be everything the gossips in my life say I am in the hopes that I can create some kind of believable fictional character. The things I write about are based on the gossip and some of my life experiences. After five years, the only thing I've learned from this experience is that I can be quite the Trickster....thus the name of the blog. Love ya!
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