Fake Out

Visiting the local salon a few weeks ago, I discovered a multitude of interesting products; such as false nails, false eyelashes, silicon make-up, wrinkle filler (face spackle), bra inserts, novelty contact lenses, hair straighteners...the list goes on and on...
So, I had my hair straightened. I walked out of that place sporting silicon make-up and glued on eye-lashes.
I bought a top stuffer and had a huge rack.
It was fun! No one recognized me! Upon arriving home, I was mistaken for my twenty-year old daughter! That felt weird.
I decided to go out and party. A little attention can do an old lady a world of good.
Then, on the way to the party do you want to know what happened?
It started to snow!
Upon arrival at my destination, I found that my hair regained its curl and my eyelashes started to run. My make-up melted off. My bra slipped and my "boobs" were lop-sided!
I looked like hell.
Well, I wanted attention.....uh....just not that kind of attention!
Goodness.
Oh, and people did recognize my curly red-hair and messed up make-up! That was a tad bit embarrassing.
I learned my lesson!

Fakers never prosper.

Oh, there is one little tiny thing I learned that day, too. Men are turned on by smeared mascara and messy hair. I don't get it but they do seem to like that - maybe it reminds them of waking up after a night of hot, steamy hugging.
I don't know....
I do know that lop-sided fake boobs, well, don't seem to turn them on as much.
Cheerio!
S.